How have you been coping? How is your relationship this period? Is it getting better or worse?
Obviously, emotional and mental stress is taking its toll on everyone. No doubt, almost everyone is trying hard to make it through this pandemic.
Surely, many relationships will go through a whole lot, some will come out broken while others come out stronger.
But, have you asked yourself or maybe planned on How to Enjoy and Stay Healthy in Your Quarantine Relationship or in your post quarantine relationship.
Wait again! Will your Dos and Donts of Dating During Covid-19 actually work in your relationship after the quarantine?
Sometimes you would want to scream at your partner for doing naughty things like dropping a wet towel on the bed. The question is, how do you want things to work out even after the pandemic?
Even a relationship that is as solid as a rock will, at times, show strains of almost breaking off.
So be ready to make or accommodate some changes. Research shows that the number of broken bonds is increasing daily.
Becoming too obvious to each other can be a turnoff.
Most things are supposed to change. Indeed, this period will teach us that we can't have it all. Whether you are among the team that has broken up or not, the love can still be stronger.
The value for each other can still increase. To be able to make it to this point you need to be strong and prepared.
If you have been looking for a way to make things stronger, this post is for you. We have tried to gather some guides from relationship experts for you.
Be ready to embrace our guides and you will be ok.
Find Space However You Can
You need your sanity intact before you lose it. Space is very important in an intimate relationship.
Space gives peace. According to Liz Colizza, "healthy relationships thrive on the dual dynamic of emotional dependency and individuality". It is safe to say that with or without the pandemic, distance comes in handy in every relationship.
Distance is hard now especially for spouses that stay together. You know how hard it is to stay away from someone who is very close to you every day. But hey, you have to create it.
Use your headphone. Do solo cooking. Take a longer shower time. All of these are forms of space.
Distance helps you to pay attention to your emotion and prevent you from blowing up and flipping at your partner. No matter the reason for the complaint, that distance should be given when it's necessary.
This will help you to carry on until the pandemic is over.
Remain Connected
No matter what happens, you guys should have alone time. Just the two of you.
Although it might be very hard for those with kids because you will have them all up in your face.
Again, we are all confined to one space now, and having no shift in the physical environment is confusing to the brain. So find a way to create a new structure around your relationship.
Pick up new routines that involve just both of you. It doesn't have to be always but try to make it happen.
Skip Small Talks
One of the problems spouses are facing now is not knowing what to say to each other. Back in those days when the earth was normal, there is always something to say.
You go out and come in so you definitely have to ask how their day went but now it is different.
If you are one of those who always lack what to say, don't bother spending a few hours of your time racking your brain to figure out what to say or ask.
Do your self a favor, go to Google. For instance, you can check the New York Times 's 36 questions that lead to love or John Gotham's 8 dates. That will help.
Another one is an app called Lasting. It guides you through physical exercise and is designed by therapists.
Note that it's not therapy. It will cost you $15 a month which is less than what you will spend on personal counseling. The app does not just keep you physically fit, it highlights other areas like trust, communication, sex life, conflict, or money.
There is a section where you will have to complete individually then come back to compare. You will be asked long questions like, " recall a time your partner was there for you" or " what do you want to change about your sex life?".
Stuff like this are a meaningful way to start a conversation especially when it reveals your partner's vulnerability and motivation.
Don't Keep Things to Yourself
There are issues beyond taking a solo walk or sharing fun times. If issues like that occur, consider a couple's therapy session.
It might be a bit awkward but if you know your relationship is worth the inconvenience then do it. You have to talk it out and have some peace.
Many therapists are holding a Skype and zoom session for their patients so it may take time to finally feel at home with them. More information is gotten when it's a face to face conversation.
It is challenging to feel that same energy when it's an online portal. Therapists urge you to be in the same place using the same screen, it will help things flow.
Then after each session, discuss it and put it into practice. Gradually everything will begin to fall into place again.
Avoid Elementary Mistakes
Instead of trying so hard to be a perfect partner why not pay attention to avoid elementary mistakes.
Studies have shown that people get little credit for delivering more than they had promised.
It is better to promise less and outdoing yourself than wanting to offer too much and end up falling short.
Commitment is a long term project so the whole thing should be taken gradually.
Don't end up ruining everything in the process of trying to impress your partner.
This is a period of great growth for couples. Either you grow together or you grow apart. If you are aiming for a positive change after the quarantine then work hard for it.
Go through whatever is required to keep the thing together. It's not easy but you can work it out.
Every person of color out there is finding it very difficult to think straight right now.
But still, it's okay to remain in love despite all happenings.