Decide You're Dope As FUQ

Find a black woman and get on her team. You can thank me later.

The black woman’s strength has got to be spoken about on a sex blog for people of color! With Black Panther breaking barriers, Black History Month just ending, and Women’s Month in full swing, of course we’ve got to talk about it.

The superwoman complex is all too real, and pretty draining. Generations of women in my family have been focused, gorgeous, extremely hard working mothers, caretakers, business connoisseurs, supporters, geniuses, and martyrs. All the women that I have read about have been too. Most of the women I cross paths with are too. It’s expected at this point. It is the rule, not the exception.

Bottom line?


I rarely laud the idea of a superwoman, because it manages to both increase pressure on what is expected of women of color and diminish all that women naturally contribute just by being. When I see a woman killing it in the game, that to me, is a woman being a woman. It is a (self-identifying) woman fulfilling who she knows she is meant to be - not magically and momentarily going outside of herself to complete the unthinkable, only to come back down at some point. Does this mean that I do not celebrate women, especially black women? Quite the contrary. I celebrate black women daily, because they deserve to be celebrated daily.

I celebrate black women, because going above and beyond is their norm. I celebrate black women, because, they along with black men, set trends, defy expectations and barriers, excel and embrace all while having envious skin, smiles, and hearts. I celebrate black women because I am one, my mom and aunts are, and many of my other role models are too.

Find a black woman and get on her team. You can thank me later.


THE FUQS

  • You are already amazing.

  • The more you know about yourself, the more you can show people how to treat and address you, both publicly and intimately.

  • The more you celebrate yourself, the less you’ll need other to do so, and the more they naturally will.

  • A celebration of self can be something as simple as the decision to smile on what ought to be a dim day because you are vibrant as FUQ.